A poor body image has nothing to do with what you look like.
Feeling bad about how you look knows no size or shape. When I was my leanest- I hated my body. When I was my biggest- I hated my body.
A negative body image is a symptom of a greater problem. One that cannot truly be repaired by continuing to focus on the size or shape of our body.
Think about it: at your smallest, did you truly love yourself more? Put yourself back in that body size. Were you truly not still an ass hole to yourself? Did you suddenly stop obsessively body checking and weighing yourself? Did you suddenly stop telling your friends how you’d feel better if you lost just a liiiitle more weight? Did you suddenly jump for joy when having to wear a bathing suit or at the opportunity to have your picture taken?
Chances are- Nope. None of that was true then in a smaller body just as it’s still not true in a larger body because body image issues have nothing to do with what you look like.
A poor body image, an obsession with your weight and your appearance have nothing to do with your external body despite what diet culture tells us.
It’s an inside job. Which means no amount of exercise or dieting will ever truly remedy the issue.
Go ahead- keep trying it your way. Wouldn’t you have felt better by now if your way worked? Chances are you’ve tried it your way for years already. Do you feel better yet?
The more we try to manipulate our body size through exercise as a means to an end as well as dieting, the more obsessed we become with what our body looks like- the more we let it define us and dictate how we feel.
I’ll ask you again- do you feel better yet?
The work is internal. It’s messy. It’s hard. It requires unlearning. It takes time. No external result will fix a shitty internal narrative. No amount of weight loss will help fix your lack of self worth.
What do I feel is waiting for me on the other end of a smaller body and why do I feel unworthy of that now?
Where did I learn my body image story from? What stories do I need to let go of?
What media am I choosing to follow that makes me feel like I’ll feel better if I lose weight?