We all have stories.
And I don’t just mean funny ones from being drunk in college and stumbling around campus.
I mean the ones that show up and dictate how we do things and why we do things. I mean the stories that we have about ourselves that we don’t say out loud or don’t even know exist. The stories that hide beneath the things that trigger us.
For me, I have a story that I am not important and that what I have to say is not worth anyone’s time. YES. The girl with lots to say has anxiety about wasting people’s time whenever she speaks. This also means I, regularly, allow people to disrespect my time- THE MOST NONRENEWABLE RESOURCE! Because, I’m not important enough for you to worry about *my* time, so- this is fine! (It’s actually not fine, btw.) I have a story that I am lazy. This manifests itself into me working myself into the ground in an effort to combat anyone who might *also* think I’m lazy.
I have a story that I am too needy. This manifests itself into me almost never asking for help (did you listen to episode 126 yet?!) and then feeling under-supported and lonely as a result.
Which makes me feel unimportant… And the cycle continues.
What’s important to remember is that we are not our thoughts and we are not our feelings.
Just because I *feel* or *think* that I am unimportant doesn’t mean that I *am* those things.
The work begins by uncovering the stories we have about ourselves and then choosing to find evidence that proves the stories that empower us to be true and disproves the shitty stories that hold us back.
The work continues by not identifying with our thoughts.
The work continues further by deciding that sometimes our stories don’t serve us. Following the shitty stories makes us feel safe because they FEEL TRUE, and the human brain is a sneaky little bitch and she likes shit that FEELS TRUE.
What *is* true is this: you’re important, your words matter, your time matters, you’re not lazy, & you’re not too needy.
You can begin by paying attention to what triggers you. Then again by figuring out WHY you do what you do. What narrative are you catering to? What story are you fulfilling? What story do you need to let go?